Hiya, Rockstar Mama... I know some days it may not seem like you are living the rockstar life, but as you organize the chaos between coffee & wine, your strength and perseverance is setting an incredible example for your child.
Even when you don’t think they are paying attention, your child is watching and learning from you.
You are fulfilling one of the most challenging, and most rewarding job positions on this planet. And when you first decide to take on Mamahood, there is no detailed job description to give you all of the pertinent details to help you prepare for this adventure. It truly is an adventure, full of twists, turns, unexpected highs and lows, and so much love.
Your days likely begin with a blurry-eyed shuffle to the coffee machine where you hope to find no left-over, forgotten coffee filter from the day before to add one more unwanted step between you and that hot cup of life force... and by the end of the day, you are probably counting down the minutes until bed time, praying that your child got enough energy out during the day, and drifts peacefully off to dreamland so that you can tip toe back to the kitchen, hide in the closet to pour your glass of wine so as not to wake your sleeping angel.
You are not alone!
So much of what I have found Mamas are working through is figuring out how best to organize the chaos in between. No matter if you have one child or ten, the balance between giving all of your attention and energy to your children and saving enough energy for your own well-being is a tricky act. I’m here to share a few tips that you can implement right now (or tomorrow, if your little angel is sleeping ;) ) to help to organize that time between coffee and wine.
1. Use a Planner... Use a day planner, a wall calendar, a bulletin board, a refrigerator magnet calendar... use whatever is going to work for you and your family. There is nothing more heart-stopping than waking up thinking you get to stay home in your pjs watching Winnie the Pooh as you attempt to clean up from last night’s baking adventure than realizing that your child has a doctor’s appointment in 45 minutes across town. Even if we don’t bring it to the extreme of missing or nearly missing essential doctor’s visits, using a planner is going to help your level of sanity and organization so much. This is where you can keep track of sleep schedules, vitamins and medicines, play dates, and those occasional events or appointments that sneak up on us so easily.
Using a planner is going to help you to conceptualize the
time that you have each day. Knowing how much time you have each day at the beginning of the week can save you SO much time and stress. If you know at the beginning of the week that Wednesday-Saturday you have appointments, play dates, and meetings, then you can more easily shop for easy prep meals, or set the time aside at the beginning of the week to meal prep in advance - no need to pop over to McDonald’s to save the day when you take action in advance!
It is also going to help you to create routines that are healthy for both you and your child... which brings me to point two.
2. Create and Implement Routines... Children thrive on routines - let’s be honest, we all do well with some degree of routine or level of preparedness for what to expect each week. Especially for children, this can help them to create healthy patterns of behavior. Creating an evening routine such as brush teeth, put on pajamas, read 1 book, turn the lights out, and sing one song may seem simple and unnecessarily structured, but once your child is accustomed to your routine, at some point the words “It’s time to get ready for bed” will be just like initiating the launch sequence on a rocket. Your child will go through the launch sequence automatically, making bedtime a predictable and more enjoyable routine with less disgruntled “But WHYYYYYY” responses when you say “Please go brush your teeth.”
Tapping into my dance teacher side, for slightly older children, you can layer behaviors. So, for example, if your child is in a dance class and meant to be practicing certain footwork or body positions, once you are confident that your child can execute their basic evening routine, stack practicing dance on with brushing their teeth. The child has to brush their teeth several times a day, so when you habit stack it makes it easier to add a new practice to their daily routine. You can do this with so many things - what is something you’d like your child to do daily? How can you pair that with something they are already executing regularly?
3. Designate Independent Time... As much as you love your child and want to be there to assist with every need, you and your child will both benefit from designated independent time. If you are an entrepreneur or work-from-home mom, these times can be designated as moments that you have to do the work that you can’t afford to be interrupted during. Having certain activities set aside that the children can only do during independent time will keep them engaged in those shorter-term activities. To help keep from constantly having to answer “what time is it,” or “how much longer,” you can implement a timer that your child can see and know that time is not yet up.
See LINK for a training I recently did to help moms set and maintain boundaries!
With these three implementations, you are well on your way to a more organized existence between your first cup of morning coffee to your last sip of your favorite wine before bed!
If you have loved this article and are looking for more support on your Rockstar Mama journey and organizing the chaos, join us inside the free community "Empowered to Thrive: Women Reaching for & Achieving Dream Goals."